Is Drew Pavlou’s Penis Real?


Arrus Kacchi 

Note: This article was written with the intent to be read aloud. 

Drew has been castrated. 

Let me explain.

In the high agency hotbed of profound philosophical and sophisticated socio-political discourse that is ‘Discussion Space,’ Matt Kurl suggests the notion that he has mentally constructed Drew Pavlou’s johnson – The Pavlouvian Phallus [henceforth: PP]. The following interaction occurs:


drew baudrillard

So I naturally figured that I’d bring into actuality this article, yet the potential descriptive article from Matt Kurl may succeed this article in time. In doing so, we have constructed a reality that now places before us a simulacrum. The precession of said the simulacrum is as follows [i]:

1) The implicit sign representing the PP (a reflection of profound reality).

2) The sign absorbed by Matt Kurl (denaturing of the profound reality).

3) The simulation of the sign representing the PP in the article that arrives from the future (masking the absence of profound reality).

Not once in this process did we ask ourselves whether the PP truly was a particular of the Real. This, however, is to be expected. We have suffocated ourselves ever since 1920s advertising, in phallus signs and signifiers within our present mode of capitalist consumer marination, symbiotically depriving us of the little space that societies of control such as ours deny us; 

“The individual never ceases passing from one closed environment to another…we are in a generalized crisis in relation to all the environments of enclosure—prison, hospital, factory, school, family. The family is an “interior,” in crisis like all other interiors—scholarly, professional, etc.” [ii]

Consequently choking on our loss of atmosphere through which we would otherwise grasp or even stroke the Real, the PP merely occupies space in the saturated hyperreal – produced from the radiating synthesis of combinatory phalluses in this hyperspace without an atmosphere, without a true original. We don’t know if Matt Kurl ever saw the PP, or whether he is truthful if or when he claims to have truly seen it. Let us force some conventional conservative wisdom into a dialectic with schizophrenic, post-post-modern accelerationist theory to shed some more light on this scene and how it came into being.

Thesis: Conservatives are inclined to argue that this presently decadent, hypersexualised mode of discourse, an affection of psychoanalysis as it may be, is a product of modernity. Sexual liberation and ubiquitous porn consumption give us our current state of phallus-sign-intoxication. These same conservatives tend to be defenders of free-markets, capitalism, and economic liberalism generally speaking.

Antithesis: Nick Land famously remarked that the essential, catalytic engine of modernity is capitalism [iii]. Capitalism and modernity name the same holistically entropic development, in terms of entelecheia – the intrinsic possession of end. It is a globalised ataxia whose evacuation from history appears inside history as capitalism, transcending and overcoding sociality – our collective being-in-the-world of which we are thrown into [iv].

Synthesis: While conservatives are right when they affirm Thatcher’s slogan implying that capitalism won the day, further nuance must be drawn to the fact that capitalism itself is the motor that enables and propels the deterritorialisation of sexual taboos and boundaries as well as the production and consumption of pornography itself. While the root of the sexual liberation of the 60s may have been essentially left-liberal and of an anti-capitalist flavour, like all revolts against capital;

“…in this germinal accelerationist matrix, there is no distinction to be made between the destruction of capitalism and its intensification. The auto-destruction of capitalism is what capitalism is.” [v]

“Perhaps there will always be a fashionable anticapitalism, but each will become unfashionable, while capitalism – becoming ever more tightly identified with its own self-surpassing – will always, inevitably, be the latest thing. ‘Means’ and ‘relations’ of production have simultaneously emulsified into competitive decentralized networks under numerical control, rendering palaeomarxist hopes of extracting a postcapitalist future from the capitalism machine overtly unimaginable. [vi]”

These Dionysian visions of excess, abundance, and orgiastic emancipation are sublated, repackaged and sold back to the revolutionary – consuming him as he consumes his new shiny new commodities. Sexual liberation is no exception, and it even has come to constitute the ousia of its most recent evolution; neoliberalism (rainbow capitalism, woke-capital and so on and so forth). This evolution produces our hyperreal PP – semiotically castrating Drew Pavlou.

“Where as representation attempts to absorb simulation by interpreting it as false representation, simulation envelops the whole edifice of representation itself as a simulacrum”. [vii]

In an analogical sense, we could even consider there to be a nameable capitalist culprit – Disney, who is responsible for Drew’s castration.

“The imaginary of Disneyland is neither true nor false, it is a deterrence machine set up in order to rejuvenate the fiction of the real in the opposite camp.” [viii]

Swap out ‘The imaginary of Disneyland’ with ‘capitalism’ itself, not the most intricate surgical procedure, and we unconceal another angle through which to explore the cavity between Drew’s legs. Drew is an upstanding libertarian socialist, a stalwart defender of human rights, a spiritual kshatriya for all that is sweet and progressive. Thus the very vitalism he represents is the antikeimenon birthed of and identical in nature to capitalism itself; an affection of its dialectical development. 

The simulacra, Matt Kurl’s creative representation, never hid the truth of the Real PP – it is the truth that hides the fact that there is none. It has no relation to any reality whatsoever: the PP is its own pure simulacrum, lost in a hyperspace oversaturated with phalluses as capital adapts to the new array of flexible methods of control that sexual emancipation and pornography offer through libido dominandi. Drew Pavlou has been semiotically and analogically castrated. Like tears in rain, we lost his dick and Matt’s article will eventually be lost in cyberspace too. Within the chaotic but stultifying, immanent plane generated by the hyperreal that floods our claustrophobic society of control, abstraction precedes the experiential. 

The simulacrum is true.


[i] Baudrillard, Jean, and Sheila Faria Glaser. Simulacra and Simulation Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press, 2018. P.6

[ii] Deleuze, Gilles. “Postscript on the Societies of Control.” October vol.59 (1992): 3-7. Accessed February 7, 2020. p.3-4

[iii] Thanos. “Dark Star – A Special Review of Nick Land’s ‘The Thirst for Annihilation: Georges Bataille and Virulent Nihilism.’” The Autistic Mercury, February 5, 2020.

[iv] Land, Nick, Robin Mackay, and Ray Brassier. Fanged Noumena: Collected Writings 1987-2007. Falmouth, United Kingdom: Urbanomic, 2019. p.305

[v] Land, Nick. “A Quick-and-Dirty Introduction to Accelerationism.” Jacobite, August 18, 2017.

[vi] Land, Nick, Robin Mackay, and Ray Brassier. Fanged Noumena: Collected Writings 1987-2007. Falmouth, United Kingdom: Urbanomic, 2019. p.625

[vii] Baudrillard, Jean, and Sheila Faria Glaser. Simulacra and Simulation Ann Arbor: University of Michigan Press, 2018. p.6

[viii] Ibid p.13

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